LOOK, THERE ARE A LOT OF THINGS NIALL CAN BE!!!!!!!! FOR INSTANCE!!!!!
HOT YOUNG ASSISTANT FIELD HOCKEY COACH AT YOUR FANCY BOARDING SCHOOL WHO ALL THE OTHER GIRLS SAY DIRTY THINGS ABOUT IN THE LOCKER ROOM BUT YOU WOULD NEVER BC YOU RESPECT HIM AS A PERSON AND AS A MENTOR BUT MOSTLY BC YOU DON’T WANT TO GIVE AWAY HOW DESPERATELY OBSESSED WITH HIM YOU REALLY ARE:
YOUR FUN, RECENTLY-DIVORCED AUNT’S HOT YOUNG DOCUMENTARY-FILMMAKER BOYFRIEND WHO SITS NEXT TO YOU AROUND THE CROWDED THANKSGIVING TABLE WHILE YOU HOLD YOUR BREATH AND TRY NOT TO SAY ANYTHING STUPID OR LET YOUR THIGH TOUCH HIS:
YOUR DAD’S HOT YOUNG WORK COLLEAGUE WHO SHOWS UP TO YOUR BIRTHDAY PARTY WITH AN ENVELOPE FULL OF CASH FOR YOU AND THEN DISAPPEARS OUT ONTO THE PATIO TO DRINK LIGHT BEER AND TALK BUSINESS WITH THE GROWN UPS AND DOESN’T EVEN NOTICE YOU SIPPING ON A SHIRLEY TEMPLE AND MAKING EYES AT HIM:
THE NEW HOT, YOUNG, AND PAINFULLY EARNEST YOUTH PASTOR AND CHOIR DIRECTOR AT YOUR LOCAL MEGA-CHURCH WHO’S GOT A LOT OF PEOPLE THINKING VERY UNHOLY THOUGHTS:
YOUR HOT YOUNG DENTAL HYGIENIST WHO YOU RUN INTO AT A FESTIVAL WHILE HE’S A LITTLE DRUNK WITH ALL HIS HOT FRIENDS AND HE REMEMBERS YOUR NAME AND GIVES YOU A HUG AND REMINDS YOU TO FLOSS AND THEN YOU TRY TO CONVINCE YOUR MOM TO LET YOU WEAR A TUBE TOP TO YOUR NEXT ORTHODONTIST APPOINTMENT:
YOUR BEST FRIEND’S OLDER BROTHER WHO’S HOME FROM SCHOOL FOR THE SUMMER SO YOU START ARRANGING A LOT OF SLEEPOVERS WITH UR FRIEND AND THEN ONE NIGHT YOU RUN INTO HIM IN THE KITCHEN IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT WHEN YOU’RE GETTING A GLASS OF WATER AND YOU GUYS END UP TALKING AND HE CONFESSES HOW BAD HE WANTS TO BE KAPPA SIG PRESIDENT NEXT YEAR AND HOW HE’S SCARED THAT JAGOFF CHAD’S GONNA GET INSTEAD CUZ HE’S A LEGACY:
